Thankfulness Year Round

How to Show Thankfulness in Seven Ways

Maybe it's because I'm getting older that I am more thankful for the simple things in life. Or maybe it's because I feel like my life is blessed beyond measure which creates my gratefulness for everything. 

Whatever the reason, whenever Thanksgiving rolls around, I often wonder why we have a holiday like this just to remind ourselves to be thankful. 

Sure, the holiday is based on the establishment of America: the sharing of a meal between the Plymouth colonists and Native Americans of the region hundreds of years ago. It is an incredible occasion that deserves to have a holiday of its own.

But, this time of year, the influx of thankfulness memes and "month of gratitude" posts pop up all over social media and I'm a bit nonplussed by it all. 

In a small way, it feels inauthentic. After all, we are given good things all the time. There are beautiful pictures to take throughout the entire year. There are things like the celebration of health, getting through a heavy heartache with family and friends, a good meal, a beautiful sunset, or the perfect cozy blanket you just thrifted. They're all good things and they happen all the time.

So, why are we not posting that regularly? And why wait until November to list what we're thankful for?

The longer I live my minimalistic lifestyle, the more I understand why minimalism is such a fantastic life trajectory. The more I'm thankful, the less I want. The less I want, the less I need. And the less I need, the more I can focus on all the beautiful things around me. It's God revealing Himself in the details no matter how minute. 

Want to add more gratitude to your life? Here are seven ways to add thankfulness to your life all year round.

1. Send a Thank You - The craft of writing is down to practically nothing these days. I rarely write a thank you note, let alone a letter. Perhaps you can thank someone for the meal they invited you to. Maybe that birthday gift really deserves a thank you, as well. Buy a box of thank you notes and start to add more gratitude to your life one note at a time.

2. Take a Photo - Want a way to be thankful for the beautiful day, the beautiful meal in front of you, or even the most perfect sunset you've ever seen? Take a photo of it. Every time you look at it, it's a constant reminder of how thankful you were to see or experience the event. If you're like me, upload it to your social media.

3. Give it Away - Show how thankful you are to have what you have and then... give it away. Does someone like your sweater? Give it to them. I've done this before. My mom loved my sweater, a sweater I didn't wear often, so I took it off (literally) and gave it to her. She's never forgotten it and wears it constantly. She's happy and I'm happy she's happy. I'm thankful it's hers now.

4. Write a Poem - Feel moved by the sunrise yesterday? What about that hummingbird that practically sat on your hand? Write a poem about it. The great thing about poetry is that it tends to be shorter than regular prose. It forces you to be sparing and succinct with your words. Poetry is a language that reveals your heart's joy and the pen writes out of the overflow of the heart.

5. Make a Phone Call - Want to thank someone for something they've done for you? How about actually calling them. I tend to be a text kind of gal, but sometimes hearing my friend's voice - or getting to see them on a Facetime call - fills a void of connection I need so badly. Talking to them is a way I can thank them for being my friend. Imagine that? Talking to a friend!

6. Bake a Treat - Thankful for your postal worker? Bake them a treat. Grateful to have friends and do life with them? Bake something for them. It's inexpensive, fun, creative, and forces you to thank them with food. Which, for most people, is probably the best gift to give. It is a consumable gift that won't sit around and collect dust.

7. Send a Text - Thinking about someone you're thankful for? Text them. I've gotten texts like these before. They're not common, but they sure are beautiful. I still think about them... even five to ten years after the fact because that text filled an empty spot in my life. An empty spot I didn't even know I had. It made me feel needed and in turn, made me grateful for them, too. 

Minimalism has been the impetus for living the most grateful life I've ever experienced. In fact, the "meat and potatoes" aspect of minimalism is predicated on thankfulness. By being thankful with less, and loving that less with all of our heart, we then can truly see how much we have

If you're looking to show thankfulness all year (and not just on social media), learn to find the good in every situation. And if nothing goes right (which feels like that happens many days), you still have the choice to appreciate your life. There is always something to be thankful for.

Take a cue from the theme of our holiday Thanksgiving and instead of one month or one day, do it every day of the year.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Book Pairing: Gratitude Journal - I do this every day! I write a few good things in the morning and afternoon and then as more good things come in, right before bed, I add a few more.

It puts me in a continual and constant state of gratitude and makes me aware of how much good surrounds me. It's overwhelming and humbling and I can't recommend this enough.

Traveling and Staying Minimal

A few months ago, I wrote a piece about how despite my valiant efforts at keeping and maintaining a minimal wardrobe, when it came to travel, I still found myself over-packing. 

I'm sure many of you can relate. There are memes and funny videos behind this concept, reminding us that though the trip is a few days, we all tend to pack twice as much as we need (we don't want to forget anything!)

Well, after having just come back a few weeks ago from a cross-country trip, I can tell you that I'm there. Finally. For once, I did not overpack. And here's the kicker: 

• I had everything I needed
• I didn't have to buy anything I forgot
• I still felt like I could've packed less

Let me dive a little deeper. These three ideas behind my travel packing have consistently been the proverbial wrench thrown into my idealistic minimalist wardrobe. Forever. And now, I've done it. I know how to bring everything I need without bringing things I don't. 

I had everything I needed - My recent trip to Florida was four nights and five days. Hence, I would need five outfits. I chose - chose - to re-wear the same outfit flying out as I would flying back home. So, I only needed four outfits. Out of transparency, I did pop in an extra top just in case of a mishap. And indeed, that mishap did happen! The couple my husband and I were visiting had two precious dogs. Said dogs were rather boisterous in the morning as I sat down to drink my coffee and that coffee ended up more on me than in my stomach. Bless their hearts. Regardless of this fluffy canine conundrum, I really did have enough clothing. One extra top (or maybe an extra pair of pants if you tend to spill on your lap) is all the excess I needed. I literally wore and used every piece of clothing I brought.

I didn't have to buy anything I forgot - Because... I didn't forget anything. My mother and I were having a warm discussion the other day about how she always uses a packing list to pack (I can vouch for this - I can still see the several-page packing list sitting on her bed as she packed her bags for a trip when I was a little girl) and I don't. She insisted this packing list made her a better packer. Perhaps this is true. I told her I never used one and rarely forgot anything. But, as I didn't point out (because this was my mom and I love her), those packing lists are over and beyond filled with things you won't need. Like a travel iron, travel hair dryer, and travel noise machine, etc. My friend's house had everything I needed and so do hotel rooms (or hotel lobbies). Once you learn to pack and keep packing only the things you need, you learn how to pack efficiently. Less is more. As my motto now goes, "If I didn't  bring it, I don't need it."

I still felt like I could've packed less - That extra shirt came in handy, but I easily could have used a shirt that I'd already worn just as well. I packed enough but I could've packed less. So, if I wanted to pack less, I would've kept a shirt and pair of pants out and instead mixed and matched previously worn items together. That would've meant three outfit choices for five days. Frankly, this is doable and fun. A top and bottom times three of each is about nine unique outfits. This means I would've had enough outfits for nine days, not five. That's amazing.

Packing light is a learned skill. I know this because it's taken me about nine years to figure out my minimalist travel wardrobe. This trip to Florida showed me I could pack light and not be in fear that I forgot something. I have graduated from my wayward years of packing more than I needed!

Give it a try. Trying packing four outfits for an eight-day trip, or two outfits for a four-day trip. See how creative you can get. Once you realize you can do so much more with less (you won't even need to check your small bags or bag, as may be the case), time is saved, and peace of mind is restored. The best part is knowing you can have fabulous vacations (or work trips) with a small (but perfect) wardrobe.

Being reliant on your confidence - rather than an overstuffed suitcase - is life-changing.

A Proverbial Simple Life

Reading through the book of Proverbs isn’t for the faint of heart. I did this very activity the other day, and read a verse that stopped me in my tracks. “A pretentious, showy life is an empty life; a plain and simple life is a full life” (Proverbs 13:7, MSG).

Woah… wait a minute. Is the smartest king who ever lived actually endorsing a simple life?

If you’ve never read Proverbs, they’re quite intense. Within 31 chapters oozing with advice, there are instructions for how to live, how to act, how to think, and how to treat others. The lists go on and on. And while it can seem like a flood of unwarranted correction - at least it feels that way for me while reading through it with what is usually a chagrined look on my face - I always go back to the truth behind it all.

Most of this book was written by a man who was - and is - still considered one of the wisest men who lived on the earth.

Sometimes, to be honest, I question his wisdom. A man with about 1000 wives seems rather… out of touch with reality. Who in their right mind would want 1000 spouses? Having one is hard enough. I can’t imagine him having to deal with 1000! 

But, I digress. 

If King Solomon was indeed one of the smartest - and wealthiest-  men who ever lived, it would behoove me to pay attention to his words. (Maybe those 1000 wives are what got him to go deep into self-examination in the first place.)

Solomon says that chasing money is like chasing after the wind (Proverbs 8:10, MSG), or the act of accumulating money is a waste of time (this is from another book he wrote, Ecclesiastes 5:10, MSG). It would seem Mr. Solomon understood that living a good life wasn’t about wealth, securing things, and obtaining riches – because he had it all, more than anyone ever had, and it wasn’t enough, nor did it satisfy him.

After reading through the book of Proverbs it looks like King Solomon was - in the end - an advocate of minimalism and simple living. That less is more. 

So, am I saying the wisest man who ever lived, should’ve been a minimalist? Maybe, maybe not. But, he surely would’ve agreed with its tenets had he lived in modern times. He figured out, probably through experience, that knowledge and wisdom were greater than money and things. Stuff was less important than people and wisdom was more important than riches.

Here are a few examples where he mentions how living a life with less (particularly money) leads to a better way of living.

“A simple life in the Fear-of-God is better than a rich life with a ton of headaches.” (Proverbs 15: 16, MSG) 

So Solomon is saying the opposite of what is promoted in our culture. Riches do not bring peace but instead with it comes headaches. This is coming from a wealthy man who it would seem could vouch for the concept that riches ease pain and suffering. Apparently, it can soothe difficulties, but in the end, causes more strife than peace. 

I can barely handle what I already have in my life. Of course, more money can temporarily ease certain problems, but I’d rather have less money than have to take care of, invest, guard, fight over, and protect those riches with a headache the size of Texas.

“Get wisdom—it’s worth more than money; choose insight over income every time” (Proverbs 16:16).

Solomon is directly telling us that money isn’t as valuable as wisdom. Money doesn’t inherently make us wise, either. Wisdom comes with the right choices, and money tends to take us to places (and people) that don’t have our best intentions at heart. To me, it sounds like he’s saying money tends to corrupt the person whereas wisdom enhances our character. This makes plain the obvious choices for a happy life: a stuff-filled life purchased with money is less great than wisdom. Okay. You don’t have to tell me twice. 

“A sterling reputation is better than striking it rich; a gracious spirit is better than money in the bank” (Proverbs 22:1. MSG).

This is an interesting statement. He’s saying that money doesn’t automatically make you a good person. This is obvious, it would seem. But it sounds like he’s had plenty of experience with people who have money yet have a horrible spirit. Did the money make them that way? Maybe for some. But it’s clear he’s saying a giving person, no matter how small the gift is, is greater than any large amount of money in the bank. That a good reputation far outweighs riches. All I have to do is think about our celebrity culture to know this is 100% true. 

Solomon and his proverbs are very easy to understand: life isn’t about stuff; it isn’t about money; it isn’t about collecting, hoarding, holding onto, and obtaining things. (Again, he should know -1000 wives sounds like a miserable retirement plan).

Instead, it’s about living with less, having a noble and integrity-filled reputation, giving away our time and love, and accumulating friends and family. All of this is greater than money and stuff. To live a disciplined life that radiates peace and simplicity instead of one vapid and devoid of anything real, and squandered on things that don’t matter, is what Solomon says we need to pay attention to.

While this is an extremely unpopular way to live (we’re inundated with scores of media telling us to have more, buy more, and be more) it sounds like a life that is rich and fulfilling in all the ways that money can’t duplicate. Search out and seek the simple life and you will be rewarded with peace and tranquility.

And as a minimalist, with simple living at the forefront of my mind, it sounds like the perfect life for me.

A Classic Wardrobe for Life

Why "being trendy" is no longer a part of my vocabulary.

Every fall, when I know cozy sweater season is approaching, I find myself perusing a few brands online to see their latest fashions and trends. And I use the guise "just to see what's in style" as my excuse for crashing back into the fast fashion world for a brief moment.

While there is a modicum of truth to that excuse (I sell vintage clothing online and it is nice to see what I should stock up on, though most items I sell are traditional pieces), there is also a small part of me that wonders if what I've transitioned to (slow fashion) is where I should be.

Yet, the moment I check in on J. Crew, L.L. Bean, and a few other traditional clothiers (even Target), I instantly remember why I'll never go back to the old days of being "on trend." The money I've spent! The fashion I thought was cool—oh my. 

Being on trend means time and money hurrying after something that is going to change a few months later. Forever. I'll never catch up. I'll never be perfectly fashionable. I'll never stop running the fashion race because that's the concept behind fast fashion.

Which is why I gave up that old way of fashion.

Now that I'm a huge proponent of slow fashion, the fast fashion lifestyle feels like a horribly miserable place to stay. I have a hard time believing I was doing that for decades, too. I thought I had to constantly change my wardrobe. I thought I had to because everyone else did it. 

That's the lie of it all.

Here's a thought to remember: Just because you can wear it, doesn't mean you should. (I mean, jeans with holes only look so good for so long). 

Here's another thought to remember: Just because a retailer says something is on trend doesn't mean it is. At the end of the day, they are a business. Their bottom line is the most important thing. And rightly so. They're a business. But try to understand it within their context: switching to slow fashion is the opposite of their goal for you.

They want you hooked on their next season's "drop." They want you to ditch classics in favor of trendy pieces so you'll always be on a merry-go-round of spending, wearing, giving away, and spending again. 

As someone who's ditched fast fashion (don't get me wrong, sometimes I need something random like a bathing suit and Target is the only place to get one - I'm not legalistic about that ) I'm in such a fantastic state of mind about my wardrobe these days. 

Minimal living has pared down my closet to what I love, but slow fashion (clothing that is made well, with real fibers, and probably vintage or on the way to being vintage) has changed how I view buying and wearing clothes.

I save money: Again, if you're living with a minimal wardrobe, make it a slow-fashion one. This may mean paying a little more upfront for a traditional piece—like an all-wool cardigan or thick denim jeans—but these will also last for years longer. Classic pieces are called classics for a reason: they'll never go out of style. That ruffly, no-shoulder top may be cute, but it probably won't be in style a year from now. Of course, it doesn't mean I can't have a statement piece or two. Those are fun. But, the majority of my closet, as a classic wardrobe, will always be in style and I'll save a fortune keeping key pieces in my go-to, everyday wardrobe.

I don't have to think about what to wear ever again: I never have to question whether or not I'm in style. With a traditional, classic, and quality wardrobe, I'll always be in style. With a minimalistic wardrobe as a bonus to the slow fashion wardrobe, my pared-down closet is the simplest thing to navigate. And packing for a trip is beyond easy. Because I don't have thirty long-sleeved tops, and now have ten, picking from those ten makes my wardrobe choices a piece of cake. I now have more time to spend doing what I want, like being with family or reading, which is a much better option than standing in my closet trying to figure out what to wear. Think about it: 10 minutes a day trying to figure out what to wear is five hours a month, which is sixty hours a year. That's a whole lot of books I could read or a whole lot of cups of coffee I can enjoy in peace. 

I'll never look like everyone else: This may be because of my personality (I'm an Enneagram Type 4, or INFJ if you're into the personality types), but looking like everyone else is the opposite of what I want. What is the fun of that? When I was young, I wanted to fit in - we all wanted our Guess jeans and jelly shoes. But even when I was living a fast-fashion lifestyle, I  hated knowing my sweater had the potential to be on every woman at any given moment. But now? Not so much. Vintage fashion, or quality pieces, while always in style, are much rarer. And when you see someone wearing a unique outfit, people notice. I know I sure do.

It's not a popular thing to not be popular. That's the polar opposite of our media-driven world. But it seems going against the grain and doing things with a bit more thought leads to a more fulfilling (and smarter) life. If you want to spend money forever on a wardrobe that will always need to be updated, great. You do that. That's what the "trendy" wardrobe is for.

But if you want to look amazing in a wardrobe that is top-quality, unique, and classic, then a classic wardrobe full of classic, traditional, perennial pieces is your best option. In the long run, you'll save time and money, and in all honesty, you'll look like a million bucks. 

To me? That's a no-brainer because that's the power of a classic wardrobe for life.

Lost and Found │ How Minimalism Gives You More Time to Do What You Love

I just lost my phone in my own house. Or at least I thought it was in the house. Five minutes later, I finally wised up and asked my husband to call it. I found it, in my car, under the seat.

Nice.

So, I just wasted five minutes. Five minutes I can't get back. Five minutes I could've spent watching cute dog videos, reading, or writing fiction. Five minutes I could've been savoring a cup of coffee.

It got me thinking. Is this something I do all the time? And if so, why am I still doing this? Why am I losing things and why is it taking so long to find them?

Well, I lost my phone because I was carrying about two thousand things out to the car. My phone was in the way essentially. But those two thousand things to the car... that right there is the problem. Doing too many things at once. 

But why does this still happen to me even when I'm not taking two thousand things to the car? Because I have too much stuff. I'm a minimalist, and I still own too many things.

How often do you look for things in the house? For me, it's at least once a day. It's a dolorous situation. I literally grieve when I know I've lost something and have to spend time finding it, and that's assuming I can find it. A serious waste of time.

What happens when I have a home stuffed with things? How easy is it to find whatever I'm looking for when the home is overflowing with garbage I don't need? It's a slippery slope, one that only adds to the elimination of a precious commodity: time.

It is said that the typical home has  300,000 items in it. I may not have had quite that much before my minimalistic ways kicked in a few years ago. But, I know many people do. And more than that.

It still meant I probably had at least 100,000 to 200,000 items to go through. It had to be because so often, I couldn't find the things that mattered most. As in, items I needed to access but couldn't find because I had misplaced them within the 200,000 other items in my home. Therein lay the problem.

I've heard that the average person spends 12 days a year looking for misplaced items.

I balked when I first read this. 12 days? That's absurd. Then I did the math and divided those 12 days by 365 days and it made perfect sense. That's only about 30 minutes a day but over a year, that's a whole lot of wasted time.

If there is any good reason to become a minimalist, not losing things would be high in the top ten for me. Become (and stay) a minimalist and your time is yours again.

Here are ten things you can do for thirty minutes instead of spending thirty minutes a day looking for a lost item:

• Read
• Take a walk
• Talk to someone on the phone / Facetime
• Paint or draw 
• Write 
• Pet an animal
• Make a meal
• Bake a treat
• Stretch
• Play an instrument

All of these things are helpful to both your brain and body. They are stress relievers and blend seamlessly into the slow-living lifestyle, which in my book, is an integral part of the minimalist lifestyle too.

If you're on the fence about adding minimalism into your life, let this be your guiding hand into a new world of living and loving. It may feel foreign at first - a life without time wasted and extraneous stuff - but it's a new life that allows you more time to do the things that really matter. It's freedom.

Minimalism is about creating space for what we love and how to really live. We give up what doesn't belong in our lives in order to bring in what does.

Book Pairing:

Slow Living: Cultivating a Life of Purpose in a Hustle-Driven World - Stephanie O'Dea